Going through a divorce is different for everyone—but one thing for certain is that it does change your life. For some people it is the end of a nightmare and the chance for a new beginning.  But it is sad no matter how you look at it.  Getting a divorce is supposed to be as emotionally traumatic as losing a parent.

Some people feel they must immediately fill the void of a partner in their life—while there are others who relish the chance to live alone. Most men seem unable to live alone—while most women love it! Women, once released from marriage, seem to feel that it would be an act of madness to go back to being a caretaker.  They love not having to get permission to buy something; they love not being judged and not being criticized. They love making their own decisions without someone always looking over their shoulder. They love their independence. And, living with a man is a lot of work. Men don’t like living alone because there is no one to take care of them. There is no one to look after them, to feed them or to care for them if they are sick.

Living alone means the freedom to come and go and to do just about anything you please. Living alone means freedom, personal control and self-realization. Living alone no longer suggests an isolated or less-social life. Living alone encourages more, not less, social interaction. In fact, living alone can make it easier to be social because single people have more free time. Living alone may very well be the more desirable way of living.

More people are living alone than at any other time in history. In many American cities—Atlanta, Denver, Seattle, San Francisco and Minneapolis—40% or more of all households are single. In Manhattan and in Washington, D.C. one in two households are single.

The best divorce advice is to let yourself heal before getting involved in a new relationship. It doesn’t happen overnight.

 

 

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