What do you do when your spouse tells you that he or she is gay and wants a divorce?  Whether you’ve been married a long time or just a few years, it is devastating. When your spouse tells you that they are gay and no longer want to be married to you, it’s as bad as if they told you they never loved you. You may start to doubt yourself and your own sexuality. Your children will be embarrassed, ashamed and humiliated. They may even take your spouse’s side against you and blame you for not knowing. You will probably wonder yourself how you did not know.

Then comes the anger and devastation of a divorce.  A divorce like this is not necessarily caused because you two don’t love each other or the breakdown of your marriage,  but circumstances beyond your control.  Being gay is not a choice. If you have children, once the anger and hurt are less, try to become friends and stay parents to your children.