“Man toils from sun to sun, but Woman’s work is never done.” Many women believe that marriage is an institution that benefits men more than women. This belief stems from the fact that many women today have to take on what they feel is a superwoman role. They work outside the house and then come to work inside the house, while a majority of the men come home and get to sit on the couch and watch television. Women who do not work outside the home also report feeling that marriage is unequal because their contribution to the marriage is undervalued. Many men believe the stereotype that if a wife is at home raising the children, that she is home sitting on the couch eating bonbons and watching soaps. Monetary estimates of the value of the services that a stay-at-home wife would range anywhere from $45,000 to $150,000 a year, or more, depending of the income of the family.

Marriage equality is the concept that spouses share equally in all aspects of the marriage—finances, working, cleaning, and especially parenting. No one parent wants to be the bad guy all the time, especially when it comes to that most important aspect of childcare, discipline. Marriage equality does not mean that each spouse does half of each chore that may need to be done, but it is more that as a couple they sit down and assess what things need to be accomplished and decide which one of them may be more competent at doing it. She may be better at fixing the car, and he may be better at balancing the checkbook. It is something that needs to be discussed without any preconceived notions of what each partner should do.

Those management techniques you use at work to build teamwork and foster good relations with co-workers could be equally effective if applied to a marriage. Treat marriage like a business, the business of your family. The same would be true for conflict resolution to keep marriage equality. “My way or the highway,” does not work well in an effective business and it does not work in marriage. Equality in marriage works best when the lines of communication remain open and honest.

 

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