Money is consistently the most common reason for conflict in a relationship. Couples with financial problems and debt have higher levels of stress and are less happy in their relationship than those who don’t.

You must be honest about your spending. It’s surprising how common it is for two people in a relationship to lie about how they spend their money. It’s called “financial infidelity,” and when it’s discovered, it represents a serious breach of trust in a relationship. Surveys suggest secret spending occurs in one out of three committed relationships. Shopping for clothes, spending money on a hobby and gambling are the three most common types of secret spending that can cause conflict in a relationship.

But it is very important that you should always have some financial independence. You should both have your own money to spend on whatever you want. This is “discretionary” money, and it should never be questioned how it is spent. It is your choice to make.

It is important in a relationship to do fun things—take a trip, go to dinner, see a show. This will help you have a better relationship.